Been A While

It's been pointed out that I'm not as active here as I used to be.  Part of it may be that I only post WIPs on Patreon anymore, but there are other, more serious reasons, which I don't really want to dive fully into...  but then again, sometimes context is needed.

The short verion is it's been a rough couple of years.  2016 was bad, and 2017 looks worse in some ways.  Last summer I fell into a depression that lasted several months, and my thoughts became pretty dark at one point or another.  I worked my way through it as best as I could, but that combined with my juggling of multiple projects lead to burnout a couple of months ago.  I still feel like I'm recovering from the entire year.

Lack of animation work has been one of the biggest factors.  Freelancing is my primary source of income, but lately there just hasn't been much work.  When a contract does come my way, too often it disappears right before it's signed.  Last year I had maybe three small contracts, and so far this year I've only had one.  And in my experience, if I don't have a contract by the end of September, then there may not be one until the following February.  I should be looking for a full-time studio job, but relocating isn't an option at the moment, for personal reasons I won't go into.

Patreon has kept me afloat, more or less.  It doesn't cover everything, though.  Earlier this year I'd been thinking about getting a new, faster, more stable computer, but simply couldn't afford it.  Then I ended up having to spend that money anyway on some emergency dental work.  So now if my computer breaks, I'm screwed.  A word of advice if you have health insurance - pay that little bit extra for dental coverage!  It'll pay for itself just from the routine cleanings, and it'll save you a lot of money if/when you need a root canal or a crown.

Advertising my Patreon more - a LOT more - might help, but that might be easier if my campaign were for just one thing.  For too long it's been fairly broad, covering pinups, comics, 3D, and anything else I might be working on.  It doesn't feel right to advertise pinups & comics, and then take a month off to work on Daisy's 3D rig, and I can't advertise my 3D work, because that's too long-term.

Commissions are something I definitely should have done more of this year, but let's be real - it's difficult to want to draw for anyone else, when you barely want to draw for yourself.  But I did finally open my commission list to patrons earlier this month, which has kept me busy.  At the very least it's a nice change of pace from random people asking for commissions, then saying they can't afford it!

For my 3D work, the desire just isn't there right now.  I'd started the year wanting to finally finish Daisy's rig, but there are too many things I've had to both teach myself and write tools for along the way.  That rigging and scripting give me art block only makes things worse.  At different points I'll think of other projects to sort of keep my engine going - modeling other characters, experimenting with new tools or techniques, making a game, etc. - but this time I only burned myself out quicker.  Now I'm taking a much-needed break from 3D at least until my next comic is finished, and I don't know how long that will take.

So anyway, if I seem a little quiet or inactive, there are reasons, and the ones I've listed here are just the cliff notes.